Figuring it Out
by Shadowwriter1636
Summary: Something has Rossi down for the count. While trying to figure it out, Joy and the team reminiscences.
1. Chapter 1 The Coin

**Figuring it all out**

 ** _Disclaimer: This is a Rossi/Strauss/Joy story, I love Rossi, I love Strauss and therefore I love Rossi and Strauss. I don't own the characters or anything dealing with Criminal Minds, except this story. I don't like the way they killed off Erin, so I change it to suit my own twisted mind_** _._ _ **Usually I write a live Strauss but for this one to work she needs to be gone**_ _._ ** _I am going to like writing Joy, her husband and Kai into my stories._**

 ** _I may write several stories of Dave and Joy getting to know one another._**

 ** _Reviews are appreciated_**

 **Chapter one: The Coin**

Worried looks, pacing, quiet whispers, even a few tears being shed, that's what Section Chief Mateo Cruz found as he entered the ICU stopping just outside of the room which contained Agent David Rossi in Georgetown University Hospital. "What do we know?" He asked, as Morgan, and Reid stepped up leaving Kate, JJ and Garcia to their quite conversation in the corner.

"Nothing." Hotch said softly shaking his head.

"Why not, it's been almost four hours." Cruz asked as Morgan speculated if he really cared or was he just there for show.

"They're running tests." Reid commented.

"So no idea what happened?"

"None! He was fine when we made the arrest. He and JJ helped pack up the evidence. We arrived back at the police station and I noticed he looked a little pale, but I figured he was just tired like the rest of us. He told me he was fine when I asked and that he was going to the men's room. When he didn't come back in a few minutes Morgan went to check on him, and found him passed out on the floor." Hotch told them looking at his friend laying in ICU. "We called the paramedics. He's been in and out, breathing is labored so they put oxygen on him, but he's fighting that when he's awake. Can't say I blame him, I wouldn't want those two little tubes up my nose. He's very agitated, not really resting when he's out." Hotch told him.

As Hotch finished the doctor walked up, "Agent Hotchner, I have some test results."

"Dr. Stevens, this is Section Chief Mateo Cruz."

Nodding the Dr looked at his chart then up to Aaron again, "our records show Agent Rossi's next of kin is his daughter?" Seeing the Unit Chief nod, "Do you know when she might be here?"

"She's on the way. I chartered a plane to get her here, she lives in California. " No sooner had Aaron finish when Joy came through the ICU doors followed by Anderson who had been sent to pick her up from the airport, "Aaron, what happened to my dad?"

Hugging Rossi's daughter, "Joy, this is Dr. Stevens, he's taking care of Dave and was just about to tell us what the tests show." Taking the young lady by the arm, "Dr. Stevens, this is Joy Struthers, Dave's daughter."

"Ms. Struthers, first as Agent Rossi's next of kin, I'm obligated to ask you, if it is okay to speak about his condition in front of others."

Looking at the doctor then the people around her, "Yes, these people are our family. Just tell me what's wrong with my dad."

"The tests we've run show there's no infections. He hasn't had a heart attack or stroke, all those tests came back normal. We're waiting on a few more, but for now we just don't know what's causing his symptoms. I'm sorry I don't have more answers, but I'll keep you updated." Dr Stevens placed his hand on her shoulder, "I've known Dave a long time he's tough. Hang in there."

Once the Dr. had gone, the team said their hellos, hugging the woman who looked scared to death. Again Hotch took her by the arm directing her to a chair outside Rossi's room. "Joy, this is Section Chief Mateo Cruz." Turning to Mat, "This is Joy, Dave's daughter."

Cruz shook her hand before adding, "I didn't know Rossi had children."

"Neither did he until a few months ago and it's a child not children." Surrounded by his closest friends she whispered more to herself than anyone else, "I just found him, I can't lose him."

"You're not going to lose him; the doctors are going to find what's causing this and fix it." Garcia told her stepping up and engulfing Joy in a hug.

Standing, she straightened herself, wiped away a tear, turned to Hotch, "Can I see him?"

"Sure, but I need to make sure you know he's out more than he's awake and when he is alert he's very agitated. It's almost as if he's in pain."

"It's okay, I can handle it. I just need to see him, talk to him. Maybe I can calm him some." She told the unit chief.

As they turned to go into Dave's room, Joy took Penelope's hand, "Will you go in with me?"

"Of course." Garcia told her as they entered to see the older profiler lying on the hospital bed asleep.

Sensing someone was in the room, Rossi opened his eyes, not really focusing on anyone. "Erin."

Hotch was immediately by his side, taking his hand. "What is it Dave?"

"Erin." He mumbled again getting more agitated.

Joy walked over to the side of the bed, placing her hand on his arm kissing his forehead. "Dad, please calm down."

Moving his head to look at his daughter, "Joy, Erin, I need Erin."

Penelope stood beside Struthers, lighting placing her hand on his leg. "Honey, Erin's gone, remember? Almost two years now."

Joy watched as he seemed to calm for a moment thinking about what he was being told. Then he began to rub his index and ring finger with his thumb. This was an action she'd seen several times when something was bothering him. Taking his hand again, "hang on a minute, Dad." Looking up at Hotch, "where are his things?"

"His things?" Aaron questioned.

"Yes, his personal effects. His wallet and the things in his pocket."

Hotch went to the door, calling out, "Someone bring me Dave's personal things."

The entire team entered as Derek handed Hotch the manila envelope with Dave's belongings. Opening the packet he handed it to Joy. Dumping the content on the foot of the bed, she rummaged through the items until she found what she was looking for. Picking it up, she placed it in her father's hand closing hers tightly around his until she was sure he felt it. Everyone watched and saw him visibly relax.

"What is that?" JJ asked.

Shrugging, "I don't know. I just know when something's bothering him he'll hold it, play with it. I've found him more than once looking at it and staring sadly."

Everyone watched as Dave began to play with the object between his fingers for a minute or two before closing his hand around it again as he drifted off to sleep.

"I know what it is." Hotch said solemnly as Reid nodded.

"Are you going to share?" Morgan asked.

Sighing, "It's Erin's one year sobriety coin. He found it on the table the night she was murdered and hasn't let go of it since. He carries it with him…always. Dave told me once that as long as he had the coin, he had a small part of Erin and she knew was watching over him…and us."

"He never talks about her anymore." Penelope said leaning into Morgan.

JJ stood next to Hotch, "I knew they were together, but I didn't think it was really serious."

Joy looked at the team, "it was very serious. He told me he'd loved her from the first time he saw her." Sitting in the chair next to him, she took his hand and sighed.

The rest of the team found chairs and sat in the room together. Finally breaking the silence, Garcia commented to no one, "He never talks about Erin anymore, why?"

"Sometimes when you love someone with every fiber of your being, it's easier to pretend you don't feel the pain of losing them… if you don't talk about them or pretend they weren't as important to you as they really were then you won't hurt anymore." Hotch commented not really sure why he said it.

"Do you think this is what Rossi was doing?" JJ asked?

"Yes." Joy answered standing to kiss her dad's forehead, before sitting back in the chair. "I found him in his office the first time we came to visit. He was staring at a picture, talking to it. I heard him tell the picture 'she would love me and would have been a wonderful grandmother to Kai.' I took the picture form his hands, and asked him who she was. At first he wasn't going to tell me, but when he placed the photo back on the desk, the way he took such care and reverence in its placement I knew whomever this lady was she was important to him. So I pressed the issue."

"Will you tell us what he told you?" Reid asked.

"At first he simply said, 'She was Erin.' I waited for him to go on, I didn't think he would, but finally he opened up and the flood gates opened. He told me she was the biggest pain in his ass, but also the love of his life. He fell in love with her the day he met her. He made sure to tell me it was after mom and he split. He said they met at the academy, dated for a little while, and then split. They spent the next twenty plus years fighting and causing each other nothing but grief. He told me most people thought they hated each other and maybe they did, but when he came out of retirement, something was different. Their fights didn't have the venom and hatred that they'd had before he retired. He said they danced around each other for years. He told me he knew something was wrong when she took a second leave of absence. Finally getting Hotch to tell him where she was, she was in rehab. He would go visit her whenever he was in town. He wanted her to know she had a friend, someone she could lean on. He wouldn't make any moves, just be her friend. One day he was teaching at the academy, she sat in on his class, only approaching him after class and when everyone had left the lecture hall. When he asked what brought her there, she told him, she'd never heard him teach so she wanted to sit in and she had something she wanted to give him. She walked up, wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him, when she broke the kiss she turned and left. He told me he was speechless and completely dumbfounded." Joy stopped talking watching as the team absorbed what she'd said. She also watched Rossi as he slept.

Hotch smiled, and Joy knew he knew the story. "Dad said that after that kiss, he knew he had to find a way to get her into his life as more than just his friend. He asked her out and she accepted. They were together as much as possible from that night on. It took her a while to relax and let others know about them, but she finally introduced him to her children. They were together a year when she was murdered."

Fighting back a tear, Joy continued. "Dad loved her. He said she completed him; she made him want to be a better man. She gave him a reason for living. She was the one woman who made him want to settle down again. He wanted to spend the rest of his life making her happy. He was going to ask her to marry him, when the team captured the replicator, he didn't get the chance. Erin Strauss won his heart twenty five years ago and Erin Strauss still has it. He tells Kia about her, and what an awesome Grandmother she would have been. Kai knows her pictures and he calls her Nana. He will tell people his nana is in heaven watching over him and Papaw." Wiping away the tears, "I think Aaron's right, he doesn't talk much about her, to all of you especially, because it causes him too much pain. I think it's easier for him to talk to Kai because Kai doesn't judge, he just loves his papaw. Kai's told us both that Nana sits on his bed while he sleeps. I don't know if it's true, but I believe in the afterlife, and I think Erin does watch over us all."

Tears had filled Garcia and JJ's eyes and threatened to spill down their cheeks, as Hotch spoke up, "Dave and Erin were good for each other. We all saw the changes in her after they started their lives together. She changed him as well. His changes weren't as noticeable, but they were there. I can honestly tell all of you, Erin loved Dave as much as he loved and still loves her. She told me once and I know she told him, she stopped drinking and stayed sober for herself and her children, but she changed for him. She knew if she was going to be the woman David Rossi wanted she'd have to lose the Ice Queen image and she did." Hotch looked off into the distance, "We all know this job isn't always kind to relationships. This job, took Haley from me, Maeve from Reid and it took Erin from Dave, but Dave told me once he doesn't regret ever loving her and even in the painful times remembering that love, he wouldn't change the time they had together."

As he finished, Rossi began to stir.


	2. Chapter 2 Remembering

Chapter 2: Remembering

Once David Rossi had been checked by both the doctor and nurses, he settled back into a calm sleep for the first time since his arrival in ICU, Erin's coin secure in his hand. Doctors still had no idea what was causing his symptoms. Once the medical staff left his room, Joy and the others returned to set with him. At first the charge nurse protested to so many being in the room, but Dr. Stevens told her it was fine as long as Dave rested and they didn't disrupt anything. He told her that these were the people closest to Rossi and it would be good for him to see them when he was awake.

Settling into the same chairs they had vacated almost an hour earlier, everyone seemed to be lost in their own thoughts. Joy sat holding her dad's hand, while Hotch sat on the other side of the bed, keeping a close watch on his best friend. Garcia leaned into Morgan, who was seated next to Joy, while JJ, Reid and Kate sat near the foot on the same side as their unit chief. Cruz had left to fill in some of the brass.

Joy watched Hotch for a long time before asking, "Aaron, what are you thinking about so hard?"

"I was just thinking about what a good friend Dave has been and how he seems to be able to bring me back when I let my ego get in the way."

"Care to elaborate, Hotch?" Morgan asked.

Sitting back in his chair, "When we were in Boston trying to catch the reaper, when he killed all those on that bus, I blamed myself. If I'd only taken the deal, I felt like I'd killed all those people myself. Dave talked me into telling him what I was feeling, when I did, he handed me his gun. Told me to go ahead, that the team would get him without me, that if I wanted to blame myself to go ahead. He then, told me the voice in my head wasn't my conscience it was my ego. He made his point, and I pulled it together. I told him that he was a little dramatic. He told me his ex always said he had a flair for the dramatic. When I asked him which ex he said all three. I remember we laughed about it."

"Mom told me after I found out he was my father, that he was passionate about things." Joy said.

Smiling Hotch continued, "Another time I remember Dave being a great friend, I was doing the FBI triathlon. I needed someone to stay with Jack and get him to the event. Dave offered, even though he had to get up and be at my place before 5 AM. Anyone that knows Rossi, knows Saturday morning are his day, no movement before 10, but he was there. "

"When did Jack start calling Rossi, Uncle Dave?" JJ asked.

"Not long after Haley died, Dave took Jack and me away for the weekend. He thought we both needed a chance to get away from the real world. We went to Disneyland, Jack loved it and it helped him get his mind off everything that had been going on. One of the waitress asked Jack if Dave was his uncle, he looked at us both told her yes and he's been Uncle Dave since." Aaron smiled at the memory. "Jack adores him and he loves Jack."

Smiling Joy looked over at her father's closest friend. "Yes he does, he's always talking about Jack and Henry." Turning to JJ, "Henry is your son, right?" JJ just nodded.

The room was quiet for several minutes then Garcia began to tell her tale. "Do you remember the case we had in Virginia when the kids were kidnapped from the school bus?" Seeing everyone nod, "That case was draining for all of us, and I was having issues with Kevin. Rossi met me at the elevator, asked how I was. I asked him if he ever just wanted to unplug from everything, literally. He opened his briefcase, took my phones and tablet. Then he took me to his house. Erin ordered pizza and the three of us spent the evening eating junk food, listened to Tony Bennett on vinyl. Rossi taught me to drink 18 year old scotch while Erin sipped on tea laughing at all the faces I'd make as I drank with Dave. I spent the night at their place and the world seemed better the next day. That was a night I'll never forget. He made me feel special and that's the night I think he and I truly became friends."

"You never told me that!" Both JJ and Morgan said at the same time.

Garcia shrugged, "No need to tell it before now. It was a moment between, Erin, Dave and I."

Morgan went next…"I remember one of the first cases we worked on with Rossi; I asked him to talk to a priest and let me talk to the parents of the murdered girl. Of course he threw me under the bus and gave me the priest to interview. When he came from talking to the parents, he tilted his sunglasses up and gave me that smirk he's famous for. Later he and I talked about it and he told me he was giving me a chance for personal growth. I told him, I got him. He wasn't a mystery to me. They said he couldn't interview serial killers…He did. They said he couldn't put together a profiling team…He did. They said there was no way in hell he would ever come back here…he did. It's in his nature. It's who he is. Then he asked me if I knew all that why I told him I didn't want to talk to the priest. I couldn't think of anything to say so I told him I was giving him an opportunity for personal growth. We both laughed and that was the beginning of our friendship."

"My mom told Dad could be a real smart ass when he wanted to be." Joy chuckled.

"That he can be, it's a side only his closest friends see." Hotch told them.

JJ leaned forward in her chair a bit running her hand along Dave's lower leg. "Joy did you know that Dave threw my wedding?" She continued as the younger woman shook her head. "It was a complete surprise. We'd had a rough case, where Will was shot and taken hostage. Dave took me to the hospital to see him and stayed with Henry in the waiting room. I guess he heard me tell Will to ask me again. The first couple times he asked I said not yet, but after almost losing him I knew it was time. He asked again and Rossi heard him. He planned the most beautiful wedding in his backyard in less than 24 hours. He even flew my mother in."

"He's done so much for each one of us. Some of them big things some of them small, he helped me when Maeve died. He let me talk and told me it was okay. That there was no time limit on grieving, but I had to let myself grieve. Then when Gideon was killed he helped me through that. The man has so much wisdom. He doesn't judge or make you feel like you're bothering him. He listens when you talk. I know when he first came back to the unit, I had to get on his nerves. I was so in awe of him, but he always took the time to guide me and teach me." Reid added.

"Someone had to teach you youngsters how it was." Dave croaked as he tried to sit up, fighting Hotch as he tried to get him to lay still.

Standing Joy noticed his temperature was up. "Relax, Dad. I'll get the nurse." Before she could get the nurse, Rossi was back to sleep.


End file.
